powerpoint gone bad

Not long ago I was with some people (normal people, that is – ones who don’t sit in front of a computer screen 24/7) and someone mentioned something in passing about blogs. In no time, I was waxing eloquent about RSS feeds, the appeal of interactive marketing, and the merits of WordPress over competing blog platforms. I was so wrapped up in my oration that I barely noticed that several of my companions had gone to refill their drinks, and the few who remained had their eyes glazed over.

Yes, the shocking reality took hold – I am in the early stages of Subject Matter Expert Information Dump Syndrome (SMEIDS). Luckily for this post, I had made the diagnosis in time. In the latter stages of the disease, victims are no longer aware of their propensity to drone on endlessly about subjects of no interest to their listeners.

The symptoms of SMEIDS include boredom, irritation, and hostility – in listeners. The cure? Remembering that people have their own enthusiasms. In the absence of strong indications to the contrary, assume those enthusiasms are different than yours.

SMEIDS manifests itself at cocktail parties, in PowerPoint presentations, and on corporate Web sites. Treatment includes limiting content to customer benefits, asking questions rather than presenting facts, and saving detailed product and service information for sub pages or sub-sub pages on one’s Web site.

If you are an SMEIDS sufferer, there is hope, I hope. I’ve begun limiting my conversation about blogs and social media to short phrases. So far, the news is good. People I’m talking to in meetings do not seem to be falling asleep as quickly as usual. In time, I anticipate a complete recovery.

The 9 Early Warning Signs of SMEIDS
If you are suspect you have SMEIDS, look over this checklist. If you answer “yes” to more than three questions, seek help immediately.

  1. Have you ever delivered a PowerPoint presentation containing more than 20 slides?
  2. Do your Web site pages average more than 750 words?
  3. Are your emails often three paragraphs or more, even in response to yes/no questions?
  4. Have you ever used the phrase, “Please allow me to explain”?
  5. Do you ever feel you are not connecting with customers?
  6. Do you often find yourself thinking, customers just don’t understand how great my company is?
  7. During a meeting, has your customer ever gone 20 minutes or more without speaking?
  8. Are you frequently interrupted?
  9. Do these interruptions sometimes appear rather contrived, such as a person ending a phone call because of a fish scaling emergency?
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