A Modest Proposal to Save the U.S. Auto Industry
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The American auto industry is in deep trouble, and our government is hard at work trying to save it through some complex type of taxpayer funded loan, subsidy, or Christmas present. An easier way to attack the problem is as follows.
Pass legislation requiring every American citizen with a driver’s license to own or lease at least one vehicle manufactured by a U.S. automaker.
Viola! Problem solved. My proposal has several blockbuster features. First, it’s simple - a refreshing change indeed from the arcane financial instruments and baffling legislation we’ve been marinating in over the past several months.
Second, it overcomes the problem of consumers choosing foreign cars based on peripheral factors. My proposal takes quality off the table. It takes fuel efficiency off the table. High resale value - off the table. Consumers simply cannot be trusted to make purchasing decisions based on the correct factors.
Third, it preserves free trade. Restrictions on free trade (the next shoe to drop in any other bailout scenario) have devastating consequences for the world economy. My proposal makes them unnecessary. Americans losing their freedom to choose a vehicle is a small price to pay for maintaining world peace, don’t you think?
Last but not least, my proposal 100% guarantees lifetime employment and explosive market share growth for U.S. automakers. No competing bailout program can make that claim! Heck, under my program, pensions could be extended to heirs, friends, and neighbors.
In short, my proposal captures the spirit of our political intentions and the public will. Let’s face it - legislators can’t hope to salvage our auto industry while hamstrung by free market whimsy. It’s time to be bold.
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Maybe you and I can introduce UK slang to Chicago. Brad...
Here, here,
Well said, Brad.
I’ve always thought of you as a man who favors complete government intervention and the withdrawal of the right of free choice of all other economic participants - especially consumers. I am pleased to see that you have not compromised on your principles.
Surely, to support the local car industry is every American’s patriotic duty.
I would like to extend your proposal further, and declare that all European countries should follow suit. This will ensure protection for European auto-manufacturers in Ford’s most promising market.
Cheers
Andrew
Andrews last blog post..Employee rights and responsibilities part 2 - Fundamental responsibilities of employees
I say, with that kind of platform you should run for high office, Brad! You obviously have exactly the frame of mind it takes to get elected these days. Or at least a post in the new Presidency.
Besides, I always knew you were a mite, y’know, whacked!
Robert Hruzeks last blog post..Bird in the Hand
Andrew, you know me well. Best of luck advancing the proposition in Europe. I think it will be an easy sell over there. Do you think you could get the Koreans interested as well?
Robert, I’m actually considering building a new political party based on the principle that restaurant staffs should be banned from singing “Happy Birthday” to patrons. That seems like the next logical cause after we fix the automobile situation. By the way, sorry you and Karen lost the election. If you had run as a combined ticket, I think you would have won.
Brad Shorrs last blog post..A Modest Proposal to Save the U.S. Auto Industry
Brad, LOL! Since moving to Michigan I have become educated. I do drive an American car but before moving here the only American vehicle I could correctly identify was a truck - as long as you didn’t ask for the model! I am now learning that this whole mess is more complex than I initially thought. Our govt funded the R&D for Toyota to develop the Prius while subjecting our own industry to a slew of restrictive (and costly) regulations. The Big 3 bailed us out during 9/11 (I had forgotten this fact). We bail out companies that employ 100,000 US workers but scoff at bailing out a company that employs 10 times that amount. Here in my town the loss of jobs has ripped through resulting in small businesses failing, grocery chains leaving the state, housing foreclosures and more. A collapse of any one of the automakers will impact suppliers who supply parts to domestic and foreign automakers and will most certainly push the country into a full on recession.
Karen Swims last blog post..The Thief Who Stole November
Hi Brad - that’s not a bad idea. The only problem I can see is making folk sell the cars they already have, so they can buy American ones. Nobody would want to buy them if they weren’t able to drive them.
Cath Lawsons last blog post..Barrack Obama - A Leader In Twitter Use
Hi Karen, We all have sympathy for workers affected by the situation (I hope), but the question is whether bailouts fix anything. Evidence points to the contrary. What I wish Michigan had done starting thirty years ago was diversify its economic base, rather than cling to a single industry obviously beset by nearly impossible systemic challenges. When I started working B2B in Chicago (about that many years ago), our local customers were 80-90% manufacturing. Today, the mix of business is around 20% manufacturing. Chicago attracted large scale distribution operations and corporate headquarters to the area - otherwise we would have been crushed. Not saying Michigan could have done the exact same thing or that Chicago doesn’t have its problems, but diversification sure helps.
Brad Shorrs last blog post..Do You Want to Win $500?
Cath, Good catch. The government would probably have to pass another law banning the sale of cars for a year or two. Something like that would take care of it.
Brad Shorrs last blog post..Do You Want to Win $500?
Hey Brad, I agree with you! Took a phone call during that last message so didn’t finish saying, yes this current crisis is the result of decisions (or lack therof) made decades ago. Bailouts clearly are not the optimal solution (look at the Airline industry) and as local Mayors have pointed out far too often the bailout ignores those most affected. There are no easy answers but I’ll tell you I have never experienced living in a state that is literally crumbling before your eyes.
Karen Swims last blog post..The Thief Who Stole November
My own proposal is to make unions illegal, thus union contracts unenforceable, so that the car companies can stop paying union members to not work at building cars. There are thousands of union members sitting around, or doing small home-based biz, and getting paid anywhere from 60-95% of their weekly wage to not build cars!
That is insane!
@Stephen, Methinks we are in for more insanity whatever road we go down with the automakers. The whole industry is so fouled up the only solution is a complete overhaul. Your idea and mine share that attribute. Down with half measures!
Brad Shorrs last blog post..Do You Want to Win $500?
Keep your eyes open for Directive 10-289, if that becomes policy I’m gonna get my posse and storm the barricades!
Brad,
After you save the auto industry, you can just keep going from industry to industry. The more intervention, the more problems we’ll have. As Robert says, you’re sure to get elected with this platform, and you’ll be guaranteed industries and businesses and organizations and interest groups and … to save forever. So you could become dictator for life.
Lillie Ammanns last blog post..Review of Dream or Destiny at Straight from Hel
Hi Lillie, I like the way you think.
Would you consider being my propaganda minister when I take office?
Brad Shorrs last blog post..Do You Want to Win $500?
I’d be honored, Brad.
Lillie Ammanns last blog post..Guest Post at Straight from Hel: How Things Change