Scene 2: Keyword Selection
FORKS
STARKE: OK, folks. It’s time to, um, pick out keywords.
KRAMER: Here’s the keywords I’d like to hear. “HIRE MORE SALES REPS.” (laughs)
STARKE: Could you knock it off, Carl? Thanks to Deline and Fishbein, we spent three weeks on our mission statement. That means we have to wrap this SEO project in 60 days.
DELINE: What are keywords?
STARKE: The IT boys say (reads from memo), “Words people use when searching on Google to lease forklift trucks in Ohio.” Any suggestions?
(Prolonged silence)
DELINE: How about … FORKS?
STARKE: That’s good!
KRAMER: I like it!
FISHBEIN: Brilliant!
GRIGSBY: No. It’s no good.
KRAMER: What do you mean, no good?
GRIGSBY: Too broad. It’ll attract too many irrelevant searches. We need to narrow it down, like, LEASE FORKLIFT TRUCKS OHIO.
DELINE: That’s not grammatical!
FISHBEIN: There should be an “in” – lease forklift trucks in Ohio.
KRAMER: I say FORKS. More searches, more leads. It’s all about volume, baby!
GRIGSBY: I beg to differ. We’re better off with a high conversion rate on a low volume term than minimal conversions on a high volume term.
FISHBEIN: Huh? Let’s put it to a vote.
STARKE: (looks at watch) Great idea, Sheila. We can still beat the crowd for lunch. All in favor of FORKS say “aye”.
KRAMER, DELINE, FISHBEIN: Aye!
STARKE: All in favor of LEASE FORKLIFT TRUCKS OHIO say “aye”.
GRIGSBY: Aye.
STARKE: The FORKS have it. Nice work, team. That only took ten minutes. Next week we’ll discuss implementation.
DELINE: Stan, can we review the mission statement instead? There’s phrasing in the fifth paragraph I’m not comfortable with.
TO BE CONTINUED …
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LMAO Brad – Big companies waste so much time in meetings and achieve nothing. And it’s scary that so many important decisions are voted on by a committee who don’t have a clue.
If they ever get round to implementing their campaign, I’m guessing their results using the word “forks” are not going to be good.
Cath Lawson\’s last blog ..Stop Being So Flucking Nice
Hi Cath, Yes, there is some underlying truth in all this silliness. Maybe we’ll have a twist ending and the company will get into the disposable cutlery business!
Brad Shorr\’s last blog ..Get Ready to Fail SEO- Scene 2
Keep the stories coming! Nothing like entertainment to get a point across.
Ha ha!
Love this story, Brad.
Well, at least they got a couple of things right: (1) they kept it simple; and (2) they kept it short (as Anakin Skywalker once said, ‘less deliberation and more action’)
They might well get a few clicks from people looking for ‘folks.’ And surely, it should be no sweat converting customers looking for cutlery (or perhaps garden tools) into folks who need a forklift truck in Ohio.
Andrew, It will all become clear in Scene 3.
Brad Shorr\’s last blog ..Get Ready to Fail SEO- Scene 2
Brad,
Sorry about my misspelling of ‘fork’ in the above comment. I can only put it down to it being too early on a Saturday morning (in Melbourne, it’s 9:00 on Saturday morning, though I note that your time counter above indicates that it’s late on Friday afternoon in Colarado), and me still trying to wake up.
(Note to self: learn lesson – do not try to do anything productive on Saturday morning; must sleep in instead!)
Wait, Andrew’s typo has lead to a whole new strategy….. Folks, gloks, forcs, borks,…
Brad, very funny. If we don’t laugh we cry, right?
Fred H Schlegel\’s last blog ..CHANGE
Fred, Andrew, I think we’ve got a new tagline for this company: FORKS FOR FOLKS. They can reel in all kinds of searches.
Brad Shorr\’s last blog ..Get Ready to Fail SEO- Scene 2